Blog: Why Writers Fear The End

There is a lot of advice out there for writers who can’t seem to finish their stories. You can buy books by the dozen on “How to Write a Novel in 30 Days,” or “How to Write a Story.” These books make tons of money, being snatched up by those who start dozens of stories, only to see those stories fall by the wayside when the next great idea comes along. So yay for those authors, who are making a fortune off of other authors’ need for advice.

In my opinion, these books all spout the same advice, worded differently enough from each other to prevent any claims of plagiarism. They also lack something important. They fail to address the reasons why writers can’t finish their stories. I’ve heard many excuses for stories not getting finished. “I can’t find the ending”, “Writer’s Block is killing me”, “I’m too busy to write”, “I can’t find the story.” But one excuse I’ve never heard vocalized is “I’m afraid.”

Fear of writing is a very real thing, but authors don’t tend to admit to it because it feels very much like failure. If you are afraid of writing, if you are afraid of finishing your story, then something is wrong. You can’t be a “real author” if you’re afraid, right?

Allow me to share something. I am a professionally published author. I have written and published over a dozen short stories. I have written and published over half a dozen RPG-related works. I am currently working on a new short story for an anthology invite. And you know what? I am terrified of the ending. Always have been, always will be. Yet, I will still get to the end, I will still write the story, and I will still finish the project I’m working on.

It sounds silly, I know, but it’s there: an honest-to-goodness mini-terror of “what the heck happens next” is perched on my shoulder every time I sit down and write. And when I’m writing licensed work, I inevitably find myself asking “but what if I want to use this idea in my next original piece?”

It’s a question that paralyzes me, sometimes for hours on end, as I agonize about the plot and story and characters. My sister once asked me to write her a Harry Potter fanfic. I had a fantastic idea for it, sat down at my keyboard, and stared at the blank screen as I realized this idea was so good, I couldn’t waste it on fanfic. I needed to keep this idea for my own original fiction. And what happened? No fanfic, as I promised my sister, and I still have yet to write the original story that popped into my head for this idea. Paralyzed by my own writing success, I couldn’t write a word.

And there is the crux of the problem. What if we are successful? How do we deal with that? What happens after that last word goes down on the page? What if that idea shouldn’t be there? What if we should hold onto that idea for dear life, hoarding it for a future tale? And what if our story bombs? What if no one wants it? What will we do?

Fear is a writer’s worst enemy. It worms its way inside you, an insidious parasite that becomes an extension of you, feeding off your hopes and dreams, fostering your depression (if you have it). It convinces you that you either have to keep those ideas pent up inside so you don’t spend them unwisely on an unsuccessful work, or that you can’t possibly succeed because your ideas are crap and you’re a horrible writer. It haunts your footsteps, whispering “You’re only mortal” in your ear like the slaves of ancient Rome did with triumphant generals. Fear persuades you to sit, hands hovering above your keyboard, second-guessing yourself while it kills inspiration with joyful glee.

It’s okay to be frightened. We all wonder, when we type in those final words, if we said too much or if we said enough. If we’re trying to tell too many stories, or if we’ve even managed to tell one. It’s okay. But it’s not okay to give into the fear, to let it take charge of us or our stories. Fear is not an excuse to stop writing. It is a challenge, an obstacle to be overcome. For many people, writing is akin to bungee-jumping without a cord. The risk of failure is far greater than our fragile egos can often handle. Every time I think about that risk, I consider a poem I once read that has these words in it:

“If you do not try, you will not fail.
But neither will you succeed.”

I carry those words inside my heart, speaking them to myself every time the terror takes me. I’m not just an author. I’m a storyteller. What I write is precious and important to me. It’s a risk to finish it, to share it with other people and hope they understand what I am saying. To hope that someone, somewhere, will be inspired by my stories and grow to love my characters as much as I do. In the end, it’s a risk worth taking. If I don’t finish, then I can’t share. Sharing is important to me. It’s why I write, to make that connection with people.

So, despite the fear of The End, I manage to keep my thoughts spinning, my fingers moving, and my stories going. I am now finishing 80% of the projects I start, 100% of those for which I have actual deadlines. I keep writing and every time I finish something, that fear gets just a little bit smaller. It will never go away, but it knows now who is in charge. Because I will write, and I will finish, no matter how much I fear The End.